Wednesday, 14 November 2012

Guest post: Love and dates for single mums

So your first marriage or serious relationship hasn’t lasted, and you’ve now got a child to look after. That’s not necessarily a reason to stop going out on dates, or looking for that special someone to give love another go with. Here is some advice for single mums looking to get back out there.

Dating for fun

The idea that dating is merely a tool used in an underlying quest to find love is something of a misunderstanding.  Dating can be a fun, social activity which can boost your confidence after a break-up, encourage you start doing the things you once loved again and meet great new people. Don’t feel like you have to hide the fact you’re a mum, either.

As a mother you may be short of time and unable to go out as much, but that doesn’t mean you can’t date. Why not give online dating a go? With dating sites like you can find compatible singles from the comfort of your own home and speak to someone before you meet up with them – it’s the perfect way to ease yourself back into the game.

If the word of dating via the web seems a little daunting, The Telegraph has lots of great advice on everything from how to ensure your profile looks positive to what to do on dates. Remember to be honest with yourself and not to lead anyone on if you do just want some fun!

Looking for love

If you are looking for a long-lasting, loving relationship, that’s fine too (and using dating websites can still help!). The important thing is to really consider what you want from this relationship; what will make you happy? Don’t be ashamed of your past – you have to be completely comfortable with your relationship history to be able to start afresh, and remember there are plenty of other single mums out there who also deserve another go at finding love. You are not alone!

Make it clear from the offset that you have a child who is very important to you and there’s no reason a new relationship can’t blossom around them. Your partner should understand what their role will be in your son or daughter’s life – check out Supernanny’s tips on step-parenting for some advice you could offer your new other half.

Use your experience

Whether you want to try onlinedating in Belfast or you’re searching for a new life partner on the London social scene, you can use your previous experiences to be more aware of what you do and don’t like, learn from what went wrong in previous relationship(s) and use that knowledge to build a better partnership this time around.